I was reminded today how the right question - asked by the right person, at the right time, in the right way - can trigger revolutionary leadership.

As the facilitator of a global leadership programme reaching hundreds of leaders, my job isn’t just to teach. It’s to hold up the mirror and ask:

Is the leader looking back at you a leader by name or by nature?

Today’s session was no different.

These were experienced, capable leaders. But the belief staring back at them was this:

“If a company decision demotivates my team, all I can do is empathise.”

The decision? Training cancelled - again - to prioritise backlog clearance.

So I asked:

“What would you like to be able to do in that situation?”

First response:

“Well, management needs to stop cancelling the training - it’s demotivating.”

I asked again:

“What would you like to be able to do in that situation?”

Second attempt:

“Maybe they could reduce the number of people who attend, so we can still manage backlog.”

Still unanswered. So I asked a third time:

“What would you like to be able to do in that situation?”

Finally, a pause… and then:

“I want to help my team keep growing.”

Bingo. That was the shift.

Because the real problem wasn’t cancelled training. It was mistaking that for a reason to stop leading.

Once we focused on growth, they began unlocking options themselves:
• Use team meetings to build voice and confidence
• Reward peer feedback to develop collaboration
• Create stretch through project ownership

That’s leadership.
Not “waiting for ‘the powers that be’ to get it right.”
Not fuelling a culture of frustration.
But adapting inside the constraint - and moving forward anyway.

By the end of the session, the mirror looked different because they were thinking differently.

All from one question, asked persistently enough to cut through the noise:

“What would you like to be able to do in that situation?”

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